In this world, Magic is Everything. All people, all races, are granted with the power to perform mystical and magical feats via grimories, mystical tomes granted to each and every child on their 15th birthday. Those blessed by the mana can have their names written down in legend.
Shattered Grimoires is the work of the mind(s) of Ardere & Shattered Grimoire's staff. All characters and content are copyright their creators, and may not be replicated without their creators' permission. Black Clover is owned by Yuki Tabata and published by Viz Shonen Jump. All images belong to their original owners. The theme you are currently viewing was made by Eliza of ElizaCodes exclusively for Shattered Grimoires.
Everything has been peaceful in Nairn snow has come, and everyone is enjoying their time preparing for the Yule Festivities. Though some of the kids who wander into the nearby forest have come back to town scared, and sometimes even a little bruised up. Upon inspection when some of the adults have gone to see what lies beyond they have come back injured as well. According to all accounts it appears some of the nearby deer have been mutated by large amounts of mana, and become quite aggressive. It is up to you to fend them off, and prevent the townsfolk from being harassed further.
[attr="class","shadowsSub"]Details
Maximum Number of Players: Max 4 people
[break]Minimum Word Count: 1,500
[break]Location: Nairn
[break]Special Requirements: N/A
[attr="class","shadowsSub"]NPC Information
What NPCs are in this mission? Please fill out the template for any notable NPCs. While those you have to socially interact with during the mission are not required any enemy that is presented in the mission must be listed in here.
Post by Satori Ryuutei on Dec 1, 2020 6:24:22 GMT -5
It wasn't long after June, he and Eve had gone out hunting the Daemon-spawn. The small bits of what felt to him as empty vengeance was by far overshadowed by the need to cleanse the creatures taint before it spread. Now that it was done, there was a sense of freedom that he hadn't felt since his return. There was still a never-ending to-do list. There was still the threat that another of the Daemon could theoretically appear at any time. But, for now, there was a measure of peace.
At least, that's what it felt like to him. He'd been informed of an issue involving a mana zone overflowing and causing rapid mutations in the local wildlife. Apparently, reindeer had begun to mutate into mana beasts and were causing problems for the locals. He had a bit of de-ja-vu, as it reminded him when he used to go out hunting with the little redhead girl that had clung to him so. He had to wonder where she was now.
Such thoughts were wasted, many were gone. Such was life. With a bit of normalcy returning to the kingdom it was time for him to return to his old hunts, and giving June continuous outlets was something of a boon. Had they finished their hunts of the Daemon? Certainly. But it hadn't been that long. There was a degree of time needed for healing, and she'd need to vent as well. There was also the question that he'd had brewing in his head since their return.
Did she wish to become the new Captain? Or did she want to wash her hands of the knights and the Silva? Bengal didn't care either way. Whatever made her happy he'd accept and help her. But he wasn't certain if the time was right to ask her those questions yet. Not until she had completely healed from the immediate emotional damage. The wound would be there for many years he was sure, but it was still fresh right now. Asking such questions of the future was better left to a later date.
Now, Bengal was walking along the street of Nairn, marveling at the fact it had changed so little since the last year. A bemused sigh leaving his lips before he pushed the door open to the inn he and June were staying at. She'd been tired and sore from his distractions last night, so he'd let her sleep in a bit. Now, he headed up the stairs with a platter in hand. Two steaming mugs in his opposite hand, one of coffee, one of tea.
Unlocking and entering the door, he glanced about the room. It was a nice inn, worth the coin unlike the ones they'd had in travel. Here her name and his own had weight after all. They could have slept in her manor but the maid--Autumn--always gave hell about him there. Even if it was silent for the most part. An inn was more convenient at night, anyway. Her room at the manor wasn't insulted very well.
"Flower," he called fondly, kicking the door closed behind him as he glanced in the direction he felt her ki. "Breakfast, and hot coffee." He offered with a slight smile.
WC: 574 TWC: 574
Statistics
Rank: Grand Fame: Tier 4 Strength: Intermediate Speed: 25m/s
Mana Skin: 24/24 Health: 20/20 Mana: 465/465 Mana Regen: +55/75
Moving forward was the most challenging aspect of loss for June. The sea of regret, guilt, and grief had been nearly unbearable, but channeling that emotional energy into magic and violence had helped alleviate it if only a little. Rather than drowning, the noblewoman found herself in a state akin to treading water with her mouth and nose just above the surface. That much hurt, but it was bearable. Her own stubbornness was enough to persevere through such things. Keeping her head above the waves came at a cost, however.
June was awake and dressed when Bengal returned. Her habit of sleeping in having faded thanks to frequent night terrors. The other reason she woke earlier was because it made her tired. Wearing herself out was the easiest way to stay afloat. Training, studying, missions, filling her every waking moment with some task, goal, or purpose left little room for feeling. It drained the steadily building pressure just enough to keep June from going under.
Her dark, woolen waistcoat complemented her figure nicely, cinching her waist a bit. Beneath it, she wore a plain linen shirt. These garments were paired with a pair of simple breaches and leather boots. The quality of her clothing made it clear that her outfit wasn't cheap although it was plain.
She looked up from polishing her sword and offered Bengal a ghost of a smile. It wasn't an expression that was easy to form anymore, but June still managed now and then.
"That sounds lovely."
The response was a good sign as well. June's appetite had drastically decreased since discovering the death of several people close to her: her parents, Yuurei, and many members of Bengal's family.
Despite not feeling terribly hungry, the Silver Eagle knew she needed to eat something before they went to investigate the disturbance. She stood, sliding her bastard sword into its sheath at her hip, hanging opposite from her grimoire. The noblewoman pulled her hair up into a bun before joining Bengal to leave the inn in search of breakfast.
"Did you enjoy your early morning walk, Tori?" June asked, using the shortened version of Bengal's name in his native tongue --Satori.
The noblewoman was slowly but steadily learning her fiance's mother tongue, but she typically only used it when they were alone together or surrounded by his family. Reaching over, the short woman grasped her partners hand, interlacing their fingers while they walked.
Post by Satori Ryuutei on Dec 1, 2020 13:44:13 GMT -5
June was dealing with it. As much as he could expect her to, as someone that was raised in this culture where the loss was viewed as something painful, terrible, and empty. Considering those facts she was holding up remarkably well, and he was proud of her for that. But he worried she would push herself a bit too far, as well. There had to be a balance. For now, she hadn't gone so far that he felt the need to correct her, however.
In truth, he hoped that doing these deeds would help her find some measure of peace. Both with their deaths, and the unresolved issues she'd had with Yuurei, and the clashing of their individual beleifs.
The smile was a good sign. The vocal response was a better one, and as she got up completely dressed now he leaned down and gave her a kiss in response to her pulling up her hair. Placing the steaming cup of hot coffee into her hand as well as the tea in his own. The chill on the air was pleasant as they exited the inn, and her soft question in regards to his walk caused him to chuckle form.
"I did, though last night was a better use of my energy," he teased with a smile, before feeling her hand interlace with his own. His fingers gave her a squeeze before shifting his gaze back forward. Her mastery of the language was growing--she'd been dedicating more time to it after their return. Hiyori was a good tutor, as airheaded as his sister could be, she was still almost disturbingly intelligent. She got all the talent from their generation, he was almost certain.
"I found out a bit, but I'd rather discuss it over breakfast," as he explained this he would shift his gaze toward the nearby restaurant. The scent of freshly baked bread and higher class food filling the air slowly. The inn served food, but it wasn't really up to either of their standards. Bengal could cook better meals himself, and June was raised on a noble's diet, and then had gotten used to his own cooking after that. This was more suitable, and so he pushed the door open.
It was warm within, pleasantly so without being overbearing. Giving her hand a squeeze he motioned idly for a waiter with his free hand, leading her toward a table with a window view of the street. Falling with a grunt into the bench that was a bit too small for him, before leaning back.
"Do you remember when the town here needed deer meat and were culling the numbers of the wolves? The few deer that were left finally repopulated. Seems like they mutated from the residual mana from the dungeon awakening, though." As he explained this he would glance toward the incoming waiter that smiled as he approached the pair.
"What can I get you two?" he inquired politely, and Bengal glanced at the menu briefly.
"Butterbeer and panned cakes for me. Eggs on the side with ham." The large order didn't appear to perturb the man whom simply nodded, before looking toward June curiously. Notably without pen or paper, clearly on the more experienced side as a server.
WC: 576 TWC: 1,150
Statistics
Rank: Grand Fame: Tier 4 Strength: Intermediate Speed: 25m/s
Mana Skin: 24/24 Health: 20/20 Mana: 465/465 Mana Regen: +55/75
Simple pleasures were difficult to fully appreciate under the weight of grief. The soft kiss of her fiance and the pleasant warmth of the coffee cup pressed into her hand didn't stir the same simple joy they normally would have. Something was missing. June sipped at the coffee, noticing that it had the perfect amount of cream and sugar to suit her tastes. Even so the taste was bland, as though the pleasure had already been sucked out of the drink.
Bengal's teasing words earned him an arched eyebrow. The two had done what lovers do the night before. That hadn't felt as numb or lifeless as most activities that June was struggling to enjoy. Her fiance had made sure of that. The memories brought a slight flush to her face before June pushed those aside. It wasn't time for that right now.
The topic quickly shifted from pleasure to business and June could feel herself cooling down. She took another sip of her coffee and nodded, giving Bengal a curious look. The light pressure on her hand was grounding, helping June feel as though she wouldn't be swept away into the void threatening to consume her whole with each waking moment.
They had already reached their destination for breakfast. The noblewoman could already tell based on the aroma of baking bread in the air that this establishment would have better fare than the inn they'd chosen to spend the night in. That, and it would be nice to eat without getting odd looks due to all the noise she had made the night prior.
Both her eyebrows rose in response to the discovery Bengal shared, a sign that June was truly surprised.
"I remember those wolves... now the deer have become the problem. It's a shame they didn't appear back when the wolves would have been able to solve the issue. It would have been more convenient."
June sighed but resolved that she would help Bengal cut down the deer just as she had helped him control the wolves. "It's too bad Yuurei can't be here, it would have been like old times," she commented right before the waiter arrived.
Her mouth twitched up at the corners while Bengal placed his order. Her lover's appetite for both food and love was large.
"Could I have breakfast tea with eggs and toast, please?"
Once the waiter departed, she glanced down at her nearly empty coffee as though empathizing with its state --tepid and nearly drained.
Post by Satori Ryuutei on Dec 2, 2020 16:48:14 GMT -5
The slight flush was a nice reaction. It showed that she was slowly working past it all, even if it was taking time. Smiling softly at the response he would let things progress naturally however, in the end, jobs came first. At least until tonight. More gasps and murmurs of emotional responses for him would come then.
He nodded at her resolute statement about the last time being more convenient if the deer had managed to mutate at the time. "It's why this is likely an unnatural mutation and not a natural mana evolution. The change is too sudden and well-timed. We'll need to keep an eye out on what may be going on. The source may still be around even after we deal with the immediate issue." As he stated this, he would arch a brow as she commented on Yuurei.
Well, that was an improvement. Commenting on the man without falling into a pit of despair or reaching for her hair again. Good. His hand lifted, reaching over the table easily and capturing her chin gently.
"The fact we can remember him in such ways is what matters," he murmured to her with a gentle smile. He knew she was drained. Tired. Felt empty. But she was still there, and moments of her personality still shown through. She just needed time, and a reason to keep pushing. He truly hoped he was giving her both of those things now. That, as the idea bounced around in his skull even now on her progression from this point. Be it training to rise in rank, or to obtain her own future outside of Clover. Either one would be just fine.
As the waiter returned and they both gave their order, he glanced over at her examining the empty cup and his eyes softened. Clearing his throat to get her attention. "Do you want a lunch while we're out? Or do you want to try some mutant venison for lunch instead?" he asked with an amused smile, even small reactions were important for her right now.
WC: 379 TWC: 1,529
Statistics
Rank: Grand Fame: Tier 4 Strength: Intermediate Speed: 25m/s
Mana Skin: 24/24 Health: 20/20 Mana: 465/465 Mana Regen: +55/75
"We should monitor this area in that case," June agreed with a frown. "It's concerning that the effects of the daemon are lingering. We need to ensure that the ley lines are purified in order to be truly free of such issues. I don't know how we would go about such a task if taking care of these deer doesn't solve the issue entirely."
Bengal's gentle tone with her earned him a look of mild surprise. "You're not going to remind me to focus on becoming strong enough not to allow something like this to occur again?"
The question embedded in that query was plain: why wasn't he reminding her that Yuurei's death was her fault for being weak and for not being there.
Guilt over the loss of people that mattered to her had propelled June only so far. Larger goals, ones that focused on improving her own strength and status aside from becoming harder to victimize weren't a priority for the grieving woman just yet. What did it matter what rank she achieved? Whose acknowledgement mattered now that Yuurei was gone? Bengal's opinion of her was informed by her performance on their many adventures together. There was no need to aim for anything other than progress, nebulous as that was.
She had yet to bond with many other Magic Knights in the Silver Eagles, yet walking away from them felt like abandoning something Yuurei had cared deeply about. Then again, June couldn't live her life according to a dead man's whims. No, there was only moving forward, wherever that lead.
In the mean time, their food arrived. The petite noblewoman decided to try her tea first, nursing the beverage while she examined her eggs and toast. Her appetite had not grown on the way here but now there was food in front of her and June was not intent on wasting it.
"I am not particularly attracted to the idea of eating something that has been contaminated by daemons. Lunch in town is preferable, as much as I enjoy your cooking."
After that, June began to pick at her food, eating the smallest bits of it until half of it was gone. Her stomach was already full despite eating so little. The noblewoman returned her attention to the tea, not bothering to sweeten it despite the slight bitterness it held.
Post by Satori Ryuutei on Dec 3, 2020 5:42:38 GMT -5
Bengal's brow arched at her question, and genuine confusion. It seemed she misunderstood the way he felt about these things. That explained a bit of her own emptiness, actually.
"Flower, I never said we weren't allowed to remember. My people's entire premise on death is to remember. We sing songs, tell stories, poems, laugh and hold the festivals in their memory after their deaths. Anger and sorrow are what we view as pointless emotions that give you nothing. To remember is to honor the fallen." His gaze slid toward the window for a moment as a slow breath released from his lips. "Even missing them is fine. What I scolded you on to gain strength was to move past your anger and sorrow. Nothing more. Those emotions... give you nothing. They only take." He was not so heartless to only think of growing stronger with no concept of why.
"Gaining strength is pointless without understanding the responsibility, and wills of the dead, that come with it." Finishing his little monologue, he would re-focus on what was going on. Shaking his head briefly.
"The taint of the Daemon is fading. This is something different, more natural. If I had a guess it's likely Krampus... the dungeon that arose this time lacks him within its ranks. It makes me think that he was... evicted, you could say. It may also be the Witch." Rubbing his chin, Bengal shrugged a bit and lifted the bite back to his lips. "In any case, I don't detect any ki from the Daemon's here, so it's not their doing. At least not directly." As he explained this he watched her eat carefully.
For a period of time his love had refused to even eat. Concern had been a light way of putting it. Now, she was at least eating actively, even if those meals were on the smaller side. The bitter tea would help her stomach digest the meal anyway. "But, lunch in town it is. It just means I get to show you off around town." Grinning he lifted another bite to his lips, despite his talking Bengal ate the meal quickly. His appetite, as usual, neigh unending.
WC: 397 TWC: 1,926
Statistics
Rank: Grand Fame: Tier 4 Strength: Intermediate Speed: 25m/s
Mana Skin: 24/24 Health: 20/20 Mana: 465/465 Mana Regen: +55/75
The surprised look on Bengal's face earned him a frown. His explanation didn't soften the effect his harsh words had on her before. It was too late for that.
"To remember is to suffer," she replied somewhat curtly before taking another sip of her tea. Deciding it wasn't worth the energy to force feed herself any longer, June set the drink aside. "Are sorrow and anger not natural reactions to discovering a loss? Even if it is important to move past such things, that is not an instantaneous process. You scolded me for not doing the impossible, Bengal. It is not my feelings that are within my control so much as my actions in response."
Her words were sharper than the smack across the face she'd given him that day. A heavy sigh followed. "This tires me. Let's focus on what we came here for, please."
No apology came. June wasn't one to apologize often nor one to do so insincerely. She felt no remorse for striking Bengal back then and felt even less for snapping at him today. His words had stung and that hurt lingered. The stubborn woman seated across from the behemoth of a man was more wont to change the subject than admit she was hurt. It was the closest she could come to backing down most days.
The Silver Eagle toyed with the remaining food on her plate, cutting it into ever smaller bits and shifting it around her plate while Bengal clarified what he meant about the source of the disturbance.
She took another bite and regretted it. By now her food was cold and the texture had become softer and slimier thanks to the runny yolk mixing with bits of toast.
"Let's not delay, then." June stood, setting a few gold pieces on the table. It was more than enough for both their meals, but the noblewoman wasn't concerned about something like waiting for the change. Now that she was reconnected to her family's wealth such things were unnecessary.
The Magic Knight strode towards the exit, trying to ignore the tight and queasy feeling in her stomach.
Post by Satori Ryuutei on Dec 3, 2020 12:27:30 GMT -5
"I'll make note you don't want my opinion or my clan's teachings on things anymore," Bengal stated dryly in response to her refusing to actually think about what he was trying to say. Shaking his head slightly with a sigh. If she wanted pity and soft words she had an entire house for that. Plenty of little servants happy to tend to her every whim and need. If June was hurt, Bengal was tired. She wanted to understand his culture and clan, but when he tried to explain their views, but when he did so she responded like a brat.
He waved it off. "So be it. I'll just fuck off then," he mused before rising idly, dusting himself off. His words were not angry, not grumpy, he was as relaxed as ever and quite literally completely dropping it. If she didn't wish to learn, he would not teach.
Instead, he shifted his gaze toward the door as she exited, making sure to wave to the owner in thanks. Exiting the building and following along after her as he shifted them slightly to lead toward the forestry. He'd been exasperated, but if she wanted to seal herself away and hide in a shell so be it. He thought she was stronger than that, but she was, in the end still innocent and naive. He'd let it be and stop caring if she wanted to be this way.
He felt the life signs ping distantly. A low hum filling his chest as he shifted his gaze toward the forestry. "Four of them... ki is definitely odd," he tilted his head to the side. Rubbing the back of his neck. They were weak. The mana they gave off was a threat to some juniors, but to them it was a casual fling of a spell.
"Do you want them?" he inquired simply, glancing to the side. "Examining the bodies after will give more important information for us than fighting them likely."
WC: 363 TWC: 2,289
Statistics
Rank: Grand Fame: Tier 4 Strength: Intermediate Speed: 25m/s
Mana Skin: 24/24 Health: 20/20 Mana: 465/465 Mana Regen: +55/75
June twitched at Bengal's response, wavering for just a moment. Something between anger, frustration, and regret bubbled up, nearly spilling past her lips. She swallowed it, her throat constricting tightly. What was the point? She had in a sense managed to say at least part of what bothered her and it meant nothing to him.
She paced around irritably until Bengal joined her outside and then fell into step with him, following her lover towards the forest. The short noblewoman was silent until the man asked her if she wanted the bodies.
"Alright. I'll examine what's left of them. We can preserve anything edible after." June assented. She didn't care about the bodies, but Bengal's logic was solid. Her duty to attend to disturbances like these wasn't dependent on what she wanted or cared about. As long as she was a Magic Knight, and especially as long as she was a Silver Eagle, June would do her due diligence.
She didn't care what they ate after this mission, either. The rift between herself and Bengal was the most bothersome thing at the moment. June wasn't sure how to cross that gap, only that she didn't like its existence. Up until now, despite how angry she felt with him, the man beside her had been her lifeline.
A twig snapped.
June had her sword ready in an instant, looking towards the source of the sound.
"It seems they have heightened senses if they've detected us at this distance," the knight remarked, knowing Bengal wouldn't have purposely stood around within range of the deer's detection until they were ready to begin.
The sound of hooves thundering against the ground came from several directions. Four deer burst forth from the trees. They were larger than average deer, more resembling reindeer or moose in size. Their antlers were sharp but twisted at odd angles. Stains on the tips of those horns confirmed that they had been the creatures responsible for the injuries reported by the townspeople.
The deer charged the pair of mages with reckless abandon only to be met with June's Protection Orb pushing them back. The deer cried out as they collided with the sphere of water, the liquid forcing itself into their eyes, noses, and ears, seeking to fill their lungs with fluid. The deer scrambled backwards. and regarded the pair of humans with caution.
"I can drop our defenses to bait them into charging us if you wish. Though they might not be in recognizable forms once you're finished with them," she offered calmly.
424/1,990
4/4 deer, each have taken intermediate damage from Hazardous Shield
Name of Spell: Protection Orb Elemental Type: Water Rank Spell Type: Senior, Defense Creation & Healing Range & Speed: 40m AoE, 45m/s Mana Cost: 30|15 Stats Effected: Mana Applicable Perks: Quick Shot, Healing Specialist, Hazardous Shield
Description: An orb formed of condensed water particles surrounds June and/or her allies. The orb is large and a slightly opaque shade of light blue. The Protection Orb has [Senior] health. After one post, anyone inside the shield begins is healed of injuries up to [Senior] level. This is reduced by one rank per person healed. Allies inside the shield regenerate [15 Mana] per post. Those that physically attack this shield suffer [Intermediate] damage from water being forced into their lungs through their mouth and nose.
Post by Satori Ryuutei on Dec 3, 2020 13:53:10 GMT -5
The sensation he felt from her ki was... frustrating. Flashes of regret and hints of her being further upset at his words. If it bothered her so much to hear what she wanted, then why even say it to begin with? June had always been a brat. She held her tongue and forced him to read her body language. But right now her body language being read did nothing. No matter what angle he took, logical, emotional, vulnerable, careful, it backfired.
He wanted to help his love. He wanted her to understand why he said what he did, but it was like talking to a wall. She refused to let him in, and refused to say what she wanted from him. He was observant, not a mind reader. A slow breath passed between his lips. He had no choice but to wait until she spoke up on her own, once again, he was powerless even in such a simple situation as this. It was appearing to become a habit.
He hated it.
The next moments blurred. The attack was so quick that as the beasts launched at them, the defense was already up. Bengal didn't even have to move as he watched the beasts drown violently in the water. Collapsing with dull, wet thuds around them. A slow breath passed his lips at her words, glancing down at her with a bemused expression.
"I don't think I'm necessary for this one it would seem," he stated simply, leaning down once the water fell to examine the corpses of the beasts. He'd have to haul them back carefully so that they could be prepared and used. His mind was distracted by his lover, but even now he lifted a hand up and placed it infront of his lips.
"My thanks, you shall not be wasted," he murmured simply, before straightening and grasping the massive bodies. Casually moving three of them into a pile, before eying the last one. He didn't wish to push June with more of his clan's teachings if she was going to explode at him, or throw up more walls. He'd carry them himself and handle them back at his clan's home. Besides, they probably needed to examine the corpses to find out if there was any strange alterations.
WC: 415 TWC: 2,704
Statistics
Rank: Grand Fame: Tier 4 Strength: Intermediate Speed: 25m/s
Mana Skin: 24/24 Health: 20/20 Mana: 465/465 Mana Regen: +55/75
June blinked, allowing the orb of water to collapse. She looked down at the drowned animals in surprise. "I... I was expecting more of a fight."
She frowned for a moment but decided to let it go. There was no reason to fuss over the job being easy. "Perhaps these are just the weaklings. If that's the case, it's better you were able to preserve your energy."
The young woman walked over to the remaining deer and set a hand on it, petting the dead animal's head before closing its eyes.
"I didn't mean to kill them like that. Drowning is an uncomfortable way to go." The words were tinged with regret and empathy. There was no pleasure in accidentally killing animals nor in causing the beasts unnecessary suffering.
"Thank you for feeding us," she whispered to the deer before standing up from her crouch and summoning River Walk. The portable stream formed quickly and settled on the ground where the Magic Knight rolled the corpse onto it. The stream made it way across the clearing with the single deer in tow before slipping beneath the pile that Satori had made.
"I can carry them back," June offered, still looking at the animals with a light frown on her face.
There wasn't an easy way for the proud noblewoman to apologize for her behavior, nor did she want to. But perhaps offering an olive branch would help bridge the rift forming between them. She didn't know how to communicate what was wrong in a way that her lover would understand, but she did know how to take care to show respect towards some of his traditions.
His words from that night still echoed in the back of her mind. Was this one more thing that was her fault? Yet another reason to atone for her sins?
Post by Satori Ryuutei on Dec 3, 2020 14:19:50 GMT -5
Bengal glanced over his shoulder as she summoned the whirling water, expressing regret over their manner of death. His eyes softened slightly. Further and further proof that she was lost. How was he supposed to help her solve the problem? To lead her out of the fog that had clouded her mind? His hand lifted, ruffling through his hair roughly in clear frustration for a long moment. That soft frown, the gentle attempt to try and reach him and respect his traditions was just like her.
She was trying. So why was she refusing to try and listen to him? This constant back and forth was a never-ending circle and Bengal was sick of it. His hands dropped from his head and hair, the job was done. They were dead. They could investigate more thoroughly later. Bengal turned to June, and without a word large arms wrapped around her. Firmly pulling her into his arms and placing his forehead against her.
"I don't know how to fix this." He murmured softly to her. "I wasn't trying to hurt anything. I haven't tried to make you feel bad. I've only ever tried to teach you like you wished and use my culture. If you don't tell me I can't help, Flower." The soft nickname was not spoken with the same playful teasing as before. It was sincere, complete confusion and loss. The same vulnerability he had exposed of himself the night he'd said the words that he couldn't comprehend had such an effect on her.
"This is all my fault, and that fault keeps piling up. I can't even protect you from it." Worthless. Useless. How many dead on his hands? How many friends lost without him even being there? How many of his own family killed without him to even be there for the festival of blood? He hadn't even been there to see off his dead family. Hadn't managed to save a single person. Not even his lover, whom had been with him the entire time.
No. He'd broken her too.
Useless. All his hard work, and it made no difference. The fractures in his hands ached. How many more times would he need to break? To fail, and shatter? To bleed and curse before he could protect even a single thing that was his?
Bengal no longer knew. His face said it all. For the first time, June would see the agony and self-loathing that stormed behind his eyes. Exposed now in his moment of weakness, in the realization that he was cornered. That even in this, a simple discussion with his love. He was powerless to help her.
WC: 475 TWC: 3,179
Statistics
Rank: Grand Fame: Tier 4 Strength: Intermediate Speed: 25m/s
Mana Skin: 24/24 Health: 20/20 Mana: 465/465 Mana Regen: +55/75
Sensing Bengal's frustration, June wondered if it was too little too late. The Magic Knight stood there, hovering nearby uncertain how she should approach her fiancé. She didn't need to figure it out. He came to her first, pulling her close and resting his forehead against hers in an intimate gesture.
However, there was no relief to be had from such a gesture. He sounded as broken and lost as June felt and it made her heart ache. Just as when he'd talked about how this was all his fault that night when he came back to her.
Without realizing it, June had wrapped her arms around the large man holding her. Her grip was tight and desperate. The flutter of mixed emotions transmitted not just by her life force but by the force with which she held onto him for dear life.
"I don't understand." Her voice was shaky. "You told me this was my fault. How can it be your responsibility what happened to my parents if I was the one who wasn't there to protect them? I--" She clung to him even more tightly, "They're gone and it's my fault. Why would you protect me? I'm the one who should pay for that. How can I pay for that if you protect me? Would it then have been your fault if I had drowned that night? If I had managed to pay for what I did?" she rambled.
The floodgates were finally. Tears streamed down her face as the grief and agony sharpened, mixing with shame. "How can my actions be your fault Satori? How is it your fault that I wasn't strong enough that I wasn't there?"
"I don't know how to learn from that teaching, Tori. I don't. I tried to make up for it but Autumn wouldn't let me so they're still gone and I'm still here."
The babbling confession revealed several things, the most important of which was that June had listened to Satori. She'd listened to the first part of what he said and been so deeply affected by its implications that she shut everything else out. The obsessive focus on that one thing had lead to a rather destructive attempt at resolution.
"It's my fault, what part of that doesn't hurt? Why would you need to try for that to hurt?"
The confusion, hurt and angst slid into place like puzzle pieces with the context June provided. She'd parroted that one part of his words over and over again. How many times had it replayed within her mind since then? How many times that night? Were those the words on her mind when she attempted to drown herself?
The paleness and gray pallor she'd had when he visited her that night fit perfectly into that disturbing context. Her listlessness. The back and forth, the conflict.